Attention all political parties, lobbyists and general polling scum bags who keep calling me 14 times a day on my cell phone and home phone and business phone.

Today I make you this offer….

If one of you political lunatics will swear to make political polling, grandstanding, mudslingging and all other BS on state tickets illegal to call me at all hours of the day and night, I WILL VOTE FOR YOU. I don’t care what your ticket is, what you want to legalize, whether you plan on embezzling oodles of money when you hit office…. hell, legalize pot and make the drinking age 16! Just make these jerks stop calling me on my private line reserved for ‘oh my god your child’s puking up blood and I gotta take him to the hospital right now’ calls.

I don’t care how important your state issue is, I don’t care who lit up, lied, slept around, or is a jack booted thug. I get the newspaper, I have internet access, I know how to read. Let me eat, sleep, work and bathe my kids in peace and you got yourself a vote.

Now back to your blogging enjoyment ;P